What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize
