i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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