Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize