lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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