last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
