Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
