youre lurking in front of me
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
