there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
bring money and cleavage
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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