I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
