i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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