We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
