in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
