fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Randomize
