I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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