Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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