i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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