plz talk dirty to me
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
