We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
