Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
