Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
