I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize