KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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