Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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