when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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