the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
