we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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