Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
