The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
