i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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