It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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