Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
