morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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