And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize