But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
