I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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