She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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