I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
