I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
