Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize