she woke up with a sticky ear
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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