did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
