He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize