Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Can I color on your dick again?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize