ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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