He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
