But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
