I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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