You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
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