Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
