I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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